Becoming Your Mother

Becoming your mother seems to be one of those fears universal to all women no matter how wonderful their mother was.  Whether it is her post-menopausal hips or her passive-aggressive means of getting her way, the worst thing a sibling or spouse can say is that you are turning into your mother.  I know this because my brother has been saying it to me since I graduated high school.  And it gets me every time.

But what, especially if you had a spectacular mother, are we so afraid of?  There is a little part of us that is always judging this woman whom we look up to for everything.  She has taught us what it is to be a woman and unfortunately we have also picked up her insecurities.  While she teaching us about relationships, good manners, and how to take care of our bodies, we became acutely aware of what things we didn't like about her.  It could be her lack of education or how she has gained weight or her unwillingness to stand up to a badgering relative.  It must be our fear of being or becoming those things that make us so hard on her.

I worry about a lack of patience.  And rightly so.  Last night my husband was playing with a bouncy ball the size of his fist that someone at work gave him.  (Thanks, K!)  Being a giant bouncy ball, it of course got out of control in the kitchen and knocked the phone over.  I asked him to stop.  I was busy making dinner.  Did he stop?  Of course not.  So a few seconds later I hear a crash and turn around to see my cell phone flying through the air along with the bouncy ball.  I found myself yelling, "Goddamnit, Justin!"

Now luckily it was my 28 year old husband I was yelling at and not my six year old child.  But it was only two bounces.  Kids are experts at doing the same thing over and over to drive you insane and I only made it two bounces!  How am I going to deal with them without a boatload of Xanex?  That is my fear.  I think that most moms do the best they can and that no one is perfect.  So give your mom a break this Mother's Day and appreciate her for all of her great qualities and just ignore everything else.  But please, whatever you do, don't call me my mother.

Comments

[Kallie]

Ha ha ha! I didn't realize he took it home. You're welcome, I think :p

Anyway, I totally relate. I can handle annoying people right now, but what about when the Zoloft is out of my system. WHAT THEN?!?